"Friendship improves happiness, and abates misery, by doubling our joys, and dividing our grief." Joseph Addison

Just a few things that delight me and make me happy...

• Old pictures of me that show me as a happy girl who had her whole life ahead of her. It cheers me to get reacquainted with that person. (Like the picture above...I was 18)
  


• The smell of a freshly made salad before any dressing is put over the top...lettuce, cucumber and tomatoes with thinly sliced red onions and perhaps some garbanzos and olives.
  


• The sound of rain and the smell of fresh, wet dirt and leaves.
  


• Walking out of the house during cooking for whatever reason and then walking back in and smelling how amazing the house smells...once in awhile, if I'm having guests over, I'll walk outside and back in again to see what it will smell like when they get there.
  


• The sound of babies laughing...but the sound of babies that I love laughing even more.
  


• The taste of fresh oranges when I am crazed for fruit in the middle of winter.
  


• Chatting and laughing with girlfriends while drinking tea.
  


• Indulging in a rare Sunday afternoon nap.
  


• Reading, reading, reading.
  


• Finishing a difficult task, that made me stretch and grow, successfully.
  


• Loving others.
  


• Sitting on the beach in the sunshine with a balmy breeze digging my bare toes into the sand.
  


• Jumping in the waves and cresting the big ones just in time so that I'm not tumbled upside down, but rather come out the other side with a slight drop back into the ocean.
  


• Seeing the stack of journals and notebooks that I have filled through the years. It's an accomplishment to fill a book...any book...with pieces of your life and moments from your brain put to paper.
  


• Riding a bicycle down a hill, gathering speed as I go.
  


• Taking photographs of things that are important to me.
  


• Music that makes it impossible not to move my body.
  


• Laughing with my brothers and sister about stories from our childhood with all of its slightly differing versions and perspectives.
  


• Really excellent quotes that are arbitrarily discovered.
  


• Chinese proverbs.
  


• Movie night with my beloved, with homemade buttered popcorn and icy ginger ale.
  


• My baby (25 yo) brother finding new music that he shares with me.
  


• Onion powder and dried parsley...I love it...I don't usually go without it and I love to use it in cooking.
  


• That I have become pretty good at making excellent gravies and sauces.
  


• Conquering the broiler and not being afraid that I'm going to somehow blow up the oven by doing it incorrectly.
  


• Talking to my heavily accented octogenarian grandma (almost nonagenarian) who's native language is Latvian, her second language is Portuguese (her growing up years and early adulthood in Brazil), and her third language is English (learned as an adult) with a smattering of Spanish thrown in (for where she lives in Los Angeles) for good measure, and having her share recipes from all the countries and cultures she has been a part of, and telling me stories about what a precocious and mischievous little girl she was.
  


• Fresh cherries that I inadvertently eat way too many of because they are just so delicious that I don't notice that I'm shoveling them in like some kind of a bulldozer.
  


• Road trips to anywhere with my beloved.
  


• Freshly cut grass and the smell of backyard BBQ's during the evening in the summertime.
  


• Kissing.
  


• Foggy evenings.
  


• Rose gardens.
  


• Hanging out with my mom and talking about life and everything that can possibly fall under that umbrella and appreciating her uniqueness and ability to accept so much in the world today.
  


• Twinkle lights in unexpected places.
  


• People who are 100% themselves...meaning that they dress themselves, speak, eat, work, play and decorate their homes according to their own designs with the things that they like and love as opposed to worrying about what everyone else thinks they should do. It is so much more interesting.
  


• Creating.
  

That's probably enough for now...I'm sure I'll come up with more as soon as I finish the post. LOL

Government Buttinski's

My sister was telling me the other day about a law that was going to be passed, wherein all toys and children's clothing must be tested more stringently for lead and other harmful elements. This particular law, seems to have the potential to put small and home business' out of business as the testing is very expensive and would not be a viable option for smaller business'.

I have come across a couple of articles, if you are interested, that talk about this new policy that will go into effect on Feb. 10th, 2009.

New Law Could Wipe Out Handcrafted Toy Makers
http://money.cnn.com/2009/01/14/smallbusiness/toy_law_threatens_small_companies.smb/?postversion=2009011509

U.S. Product Consumer Safety Commission Site
http://money.cnn.com/2009/01/14/smallbusiness/toy_law_threatens_small_companies.smb/?postversion=2009011509
FAQ's on This Particular Topic:
http://www.cpsc.gov/ABOUT/Cpsia/faq/faq.html#children

Here is the Etsy Forum with a variety of discusionss regarding the CPSIA ruling particularly:
http://www.etsy.com/forums_board.php?forum_id=5000002

Handmade Toy Alliance
http://www.handmadetoyalliance.org/

Petition
http://www.ipetitions.com/petition/handmadetoys/index.html

Honestly, my questions are as follows:

• If there was already a Product Consumer Safety Commission, how is it that all of these recent problems with lead in the toys ocurred? Were the monitors of the monitors of the monitors not paying attention?
• I'm not anti-import by any means...but I do think quality standards for quality and content need to be in place. Where were those?
• Isn't this a case of Big Business vs. Small Business, wherein all of the laws and constraints are in favor of the Big Business which in turn will put the Small Business out of business? Big Business has the funds needed to provide for any type of testing, however a smaller business will not have the funding available and therefore will be unable to sell hand crafted items.
• Also, homemade children's toys, things that are sewn, made out of wood, hand crafted are generally made and purchased by environmentally conscious individuals...people who are looking to support small business' and local business', people who are looking to consume things that are done in a very particular way. Don't you think that the sellers and the purchasers are going to be paying attention to what is going on their children's bodies and in their little mouths?

I'm all for safety for children, for keeping unhealthy elements out of the things they put in their mouths, BUT, I also believe in a pretty liberal freedom of choice rule. As a parent/guardian/caregiver it is each of our individual responsibilities to keep a good eye out and make sure that things are being done properly without getting ridiculous. It is impossible to try to child-proof the world. Not only impossible, but unreasonable.

I think there is definitely a place for government regulation...and I think it should start with the quality and quantity of inferior items that do not pass governement guidelines being imported into the country. Just like I don't like or purchase inferior U.S. products, I'm not looking to purchase inferior non-U.S. products. I am looking for quality and for once I would like to see someone deliver it and meet some reasonable expectations.

I actually think this a potential case for over-regulation and meddling from the government. I also think it has a lot to do with money and power exchanging hands in high places. I am not for the government peering over my shoulder at every turn making sure that I'm making a good decision according to their standards. Frankly, my standards are probably higher, but I don't want a Buttinski watching everything I do. Back off.

Regulate what needs to be regulated...Stop...Pause...Think...Look Before You Leap...and Be AWARE of making blanket decisions and the impact that those decisions can have across the board. Sheesh...and a whole slew of these people went to Business School, have MBA's, Law Degrees, and etc...you'd think one or two of them might figure out a viable solution that is in the best interest of the actual citizens.

Tracy = Water Girl = Ecstatic Joy

I am so delighted with the new look of my blog!


I needed to make some changes. Much as I love J.W. Waterhouse and dark colors and mellow music, I am sick to death of the winter...and it's only January...which means that there are several gray months to go. That said I thought I would make it delightful and bright and light here...at least for now...until I brood again...LOL.


At any rate, I've changed the music up a bit, taken some selections from little brothers playlist and incorporated it with a bunch of my own favorites or newer interesting choices.


The new picture is by photographer Howard Schatz. I don't know his name for it but I call it The Water Witch and I love it. He has done a number of series of underwater/water/pool related photos and is phenomenal. I realized when I came across a bunch of his artwork today, that I had seen a couple of pieces a few years ago and really liked him then as well. It was in an advertisement and his name was nowhere to be seen at the time, so I was glad to finally, formally make the acquaintance. The original piece that I saw was: U/W #49 from Pool Light. He has a broad portfolio and has done some amazing work with the human form in light, in water and in action. A good portion of his work is in nudes, so if you don't like nudes or they offend you he is definitely not the artist for you. If you are interested, here is the link to his site: http://www.howardschatz.com/


The new green and blue background is by Sugar and Spice: http://mysugarandspicecreations.blogspot.com/


In my perusings today I found a pretty cool website: http://www.surfmusic.com/

It really struck a chord with me and I was really excited to find it.


Having grown up and vacationed near oceans for a reasonable portion of my life, and having had a Brazilian father who transplanted to California and a California Girl for a mother, I had a significant amount of beach time logged in at a very young age. I love the water, the sun, the sand, the fresh air and definitely the outdoorsey feel that goes along with that. I also love surf and beach music. I came across this site today and they have several available playlists which I had a lot of fun browsing through today. If summer is feeling too far away right now...give it a look-see...let a little light in...think of balmier times.


Also, while perusing all things ocean and water today, I came across a quote that I thought would be interesting to share, it is by Euripides and says: "Neither earth nor ocean produces a creature as savage and as monstrous as woman." Sooooooo...Euripides? Of course it is possible that since it is only a one-sentence quote that I am taking it completely out of context, but I highly doubt that will be the case once I look into it a bit further...o.k...I take it back, maybe I was a little bit wrong...or a lot of bit...but here it is: Euripides was the last of the great tragedians in Greek history. He was considered out of his time, and one of the reasons for this was because he wrote women into strong and realistic roles and portrayed slaves as intelligent beings, allowing them their humanity and not villainizing them at every turn. Unfortunately not a lot is known about him beyond the brief bio. So, something new learned today. If you want more detail on him, you kind find info on him in Wiki: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Euripides


So, with that, for now, it's time to make dinner and get something done around this home of mine. A parting thought...


"May your joys be as deep as the ocean, your sorrows as light as its foam." Anonymous

Reports of My Assimilation Have Been Greatly Exaggerated.

O.k. o.k. so it's been a few days since the last posting. I promise I have been in absentia with relatively good reason.

Apparently there was a slight incident of tooth decay...you know...little microbes swirling around inside your mouth just looking for a chance to wreak a little havoc...build a budding little thoroughfare, perhaps a burgeoning metropolis...munching on the bug buffett...looking for a nerve to chew on, jump on and throw a kegger on...yes...first adult cavity and it was a doozy. Two appointments, six hours in the chair of delight, multiple drill bits, x-rays, a small amount of blood, some smoke billowing out of my mouth, the smell of burnt bone and blood, $1800 and one root canal later...and I'm as good as gold or better...or as my beloved would say "Hey girl, let's see that $1800 grill!"

I have never known such misery as I did before this whole tooth thing. I've known pain...and I've known pain...but when it's in your head like that...constant...incessant...never ending...ugh...what a weekend.

Anyway...I originally thought I could sit down at the computer waiting for some meds to kick in on Saturday, but that didn't go so well. After about 5 minutes I had had it and was on to the next activity which involved a very hot shower beating on my face just to get a little relief waiting for the Lortab to kick in. 15 minutes out of the shower and I wanted to start howling at the moon again. It took longer than I thought for the Lortab to take effect...but once it did...good times my friends...good times. Needless to say, my entire weekend was more of the same. I was able to get an emergency appointment with a brand new dentist on Monday afternoon, so fortunately I didn't have to wait long.

So this has been my personal hell and my own little drama these past few days, but I feel phenomenal now. In fact I realized that when pain is slowly creeping, and you keep ignoring it, not realizing that it is building up gradually, bit by bit, until you get the problem fixed and are better, you don't quite realize how poorly off you really were.

Also, in the interim of my indisposition I have read and enjoyed the following books:
The House of Night Books by PC Cast and her daughter Kristin Cast
I: Marked
II: Betrayed
III: Chosen
IV: Untamed
They are teen books, so it was reading lite, teen angst, problem solving, self discovery and vampirism, but they were enjoyable and the Cast women spin a good story.

I also read Driving With Dead People: A Memoir by Monica Holloway. Interesting story full of humanity in all its joy, its pain, its light, its darkness and need to be understood.

So enough for now...it's late, I'm tired and I have harp lessons in the morning which I need to get up for...so auf wiedersehn, adieu, au revoir, tchau and I'll write again soon.

"I Took a Deep Breath and Listened to the Old Bray of My Heart. I Am. I Am. I Am." Sylvia Plath

The original photo on which this set is based, is a self portrait I did back in October. I've been wanting to stretch my artistic muslces so they don't atrophy too badly and this is what I came up with.

The second one is my favorite. I really like how the texture worked out on this one, as well as adding additional patterns and colors to the whole piece.

Splish Spash I Was Takin' a Bath...

We were at my mom's on Sunday night, we being siblings and their spouses and kids and my husband and I, and during the course of the evening it came time to give the babies a hose down after feeding time in the rainforest.

They were so happy and squealy and they do love their bath time. I thought it would be a great opportunity to get some photos taken...discreet of course.

This one is my favorite. The water is individualized and the color turned out so well. The baby's cheeks are a beautiful pink with little cupid bow red lips. I may blow this one up to hang in my own bathroom.

February 23rd, 2004...A story from the Philippines

Digging, digging...here is a story I had completely forgotten about...kind of funny.

At the time, I was trying to get everything updated but due to lags in technology, I had a few minutes to type up this experience I was right in the middle of. I was corresponding with a bunch of girlfriends online, so that is who the writing is addressed to.

Rest assured...I LOVE the Philippines, and travelled there frequently. In fact, I haven't been there for several years and I miss it sorely. I love travelling, I love new people and making friends, however, that said, sometimes people get a little enthusiastic, and this can be the result.
*****************************************

O.k.--because my email is taking so long to update I've got time for a quick "Story" from the Philippines...

Quick background...my company requires that I work US hours while here in the Philippines--this said--I travel to work exclusively at night--usually the middle of the night (between 11:00 p.m. and 2:00 a.m. depending on my schedule)...the hotel taxi's take me to and from work and so people become familiar with your face...that said...read on...

I have just been recently accosted, early Saturday morning, by one of the many hotel taxi drivers who ferry me to and fro. He has delcared his great affection for me and how wonderful and beautiful he thinks I am--so now, it is "Dodge The Driver" for another two weeks! He drove me to work earlier this week (1x) and apparently ever since has been looking for my fare. He indicated that he had asked all his friends...the other drivers...if they had seen me and they said "oh, yes--I drove her yesterday or today" or whatever--so this should be a lively entertainment over the next two weeks ("Your face is so beautiful, ma'am!" and "You look lovely today in red, ma'am!" and "I am hoping to get your fare this morning, ma'am!")...this happens at least 1-2 times per trip whenever I leave the country but I was hoping to lay low this time around...no such luck!

This morning he was my driver again...I cringed when I saw him at the concierge's desk...and I have been elevated from a paltry "Ma'am" to "Madam" and what "Madam wishes, wants etc."...me, a madam?! Not likely--number one I don't work in a brothel, but, number two, I'm not 78--I'm 34!

This man is married, I am married and very definitely NOT interested (I do not think I can even properly express how NOT interested I am in this man or any other man for that matter!)--to the point that I try to give single word answers...I have reminded him, in conversation, of his young son--his wife--my husband, but to no avail--so like I said--it's Dodge the Driver and he had better lighten up or I am going to decline his driving services, and I really don't want to embarass him in front of his colleagues.

To give you some additional background...when I was 18 and flying alone from the East coast to the West coast to go to school , a Saudi doctor proposed "an arranagement" and wanted to "get to know me" and thought I would "like his country"--it's true...I would have loved his country and I do love to travel...but he was 45 or so...I was 18 and numerous other reasons to match why I was not about to engage in a relationship of any sort with this man. He did keep offering a sesame cookie to me though...hmmm...

I went to Turkey and was accosted, cat called and actually pinched! by numerous waiters, taxi drivers and soldiers on the street...

I went to Mexico City and the same thing happened...

I went to California to visit my aging grandparents and we drove to the beach (it was March) to look at the ocean and a Mexican stranger solicited me in Spanish--even though I looked around and thought "Who the hell is this man motioning too?" It didn't even cross my mind that it was me!! Aged grandparents, wedding bands and did I still want to join him for a walk?! Thank you, no, friend!

Now--I do not view myself as any great beauty or stunning starlet---in fact I'm not currently all that pleased with my overall personal appearance--so while American's may not look twice---everyone else apparently does!

I tell my husband these stories and he just laughs---and says---"I told you that you are beautiful! Why don't you listen to me? You radiate!" Gush, gush...so it does make me all warm and mushy inside...but still...come on...What are they thinking?!--Well, I take that back. I think we all know what they are thinking...

Well, I'm replicated--hope you enjoyed the story...I'd love to hear any of yours if you have them to tell!!

Ha Ha's and Yeah Right's...

So, like I said, I've been digging around in old writings, documents and etc.

For fun, I looked up my year end review from last year (2007) which was submitted shortly before the lay off and dissolution of my department. Here is a brief excerpt:

"In this next year (2008), I look forward to opportunities to continue to prove myself as well as to gain exposure to a different spectrum of employees and potential mentors, through thoughtful upward networking. It is my plan to continue to excel in R6 and to establish a finely tuned budgetary machine so that these processes in Strategic Operations become seamless."

So...let's evaluate 2008 based on this statement:

• I had opportunities to prove myself...outside of the company...at home in the garden.
• I did gain exposure to a different spectrum of people...no employees...no true mentors...but I did get to associate with friends and family a lot more than I would have. The babies (niece and nephew) and I are very well acquainted. We've learned new words, played in the dirt and picked flowers, gone swimming, read books, found our bellybuttons, thrown a few outstanding tantrums and laughed and smiled a lot.
• Upward Networking...yeah...hmmmm...not so much.
• As far as excelling in and establishing a finely tuned budgetary machine...well...since we are down to a one employed adult household, the budgetary machine is pretty tight that's for sure! LOL
• Seamless operations...still working on that...gonna have to get back to you on that one.

Things not mentioned, but that were a benefit...

• I really had a great opportunity to wind down a bit, no doubt this was a good thing health-wise.
• I enjoyed the home we moved into a couple of years ago...got better acquainted with it, and got to know the neighborhood and community a lot better.
• I was able to volunteer for the big community 4th of July extravaganza, which I would not have necessarily been able to do before.
• I had a lot of time to redirect my mind, thinking about where I want to go during these next few years.
• I also read a lot which is always a delight.
• I enjoyed my family much more than usual...Not so stressed=happiness...LOL

For sure there has been a tremendous amount of change this year. From full, 60 and sometimes 70 hour work weeks, and a daily 2-hour+ commute, tremendous pressure to perform, leadership opportunities, presentations, activities and volunteerism in the work place...all of which I did enjoy for the most part...to the pressure of being let go and all of the feelings and emotions that go with that (am I a failure? how do I now define myself? what am I going to do? where am I going to go? Yippee! Boo!), all of the concerns and worries around money, budget and providing for your family and maintaining your current lifestyle...all of that is fairly weighty stuff.

Not to mention the ongoing job search in a tight economy & job market. That piece of the picture has played out quite differently than I expected.

So 2009, while starting out fresh and new, still managed to drag some of the old and tiresome worries into it from 2008. I do have high hopes for 2009 but 13 days in and it has already been a lot of work. Getting this money/job weight taken care of will really be a significant improvement and I'm interested to see how it will play out.

Again With the Late Night Musings

I'm doing some late night laundry...the laundry fairy has the flu apparently and wasn't able to come over...so here I am...but I don't mind. I'm tired because I've been trying to get to bed much, much earlier...but I'm still enjoying the late night hour.

I've got the scent of Bounce in the air, I can hear the dryer rolling and tumbling and I've got a nice mix of music playing on Playlist. I'm perusing a notebook I've been using lately and have come across some ideas and thoughts that I jotted down some time ago regarding my feelings about the company I recently worked for, that laid me off. More about that later.

I've also gotten said notebook in order with tabs and labels and can now readily turn to the page that I may need. I've been writing thoughts and musings, short poetry, pondering on time and life and where I'm at. Wondering really where my road is right now. It seems that perhaps it is a bit overgrown, because I'm having a hard time finding it. I hope I didn't miss the turn off.

I've been wanting to write for some time now, but just didn't know what to write about. Typical. I decided to write about what I know. About my life, my memories, my musings, my experiences. Nothing like real life to get the ideas rolling. So today I wrote four pages, which will turn into more as I continue to flesh out my thoughts and ideas. I'm writing about this recent experience of getting laid off. It's replete with humor, tragedy, confusion and joy.

I also wrote a short piece to my unborn child...my child that may or may not ever be. Who knows. Infertility has been a burden I have unexpectedly had to bear through the years. It was not ever a part of the bigger picture that I had for myself all those many years ago. But here it is. There is the possibility that things could change, but 13 years into it, I'm not holding my breath about it. I think with the ticking of the biological clock...the screaming in my head that time is passing and that the biological option is actually starting to fade...has been too much on my mind lately.

I haven't felt such strong emotions about it, since the beginning, relatively speaking. I think because I always thought "There's still time. I'm only 27. I'm only 29. I'm only 32. I'm only 35. I'm only 38." Well now, in almost exactly one month I'm going to be 39. And 39 is only a stumble from 40 and once 40 hits...well the clock starts winding down and closing up shop. Sure, you might sneak a last minute purchase in right as the register is closing...but seriously...sometimes you get caught in traffic and the light turns out and the door gets locked as you're parking the car and running for the door. You get my meaning.

Anyway, these are my thoughts of late. Just trying to figure it all out. Next steps, new phases, dying hope in some things, new hope in others.

Love Poem To My Unborn Baby…
Who Has Not Yet Been And May Yet Never Be.

Sweet angel mine I’ve waited years for you.
Pondered on the beauty of your yet unknown face, loved you down to your tiniest yet undeveloped toes and not yet beating heart.
No one knows my love for you, seeded so deeply in the very inner sanctum of my heart where the beauty of my last ember of dying hope remains.
Age creeps along, and time passes and life is unexpected in the dreams she dashes and the hopes she cracks.

Every day one day closer to the passing of a possibility…
You have been loved forever…all the time before…and all the time after.
From the time I was a little girl and loved my dolls like my children.
You were there then, in every tender touch, in every child’s embrace.
I was making ready for you, but you never came.

I hope that all of the homes that you have gone to have loved you the way they should.
I hope that every mother who has kissed your face has seen the beauty in your eyes.I hope that every father that has tossed you in the air has heard the tinkling delight of your laughter.
You will be loved by me forever after even when time has turned my womb to dust, Because my love you are in my heart…deep within…with that last ember of dying hope.

Got Tagged....

Well, I was "tagged" by a friend to make a list of 25 items...habits, goals, things that have happened to me etc. that people might not necessarily know about me. So I wrote it up...and this is what I came up with:


1. I like good fruitcake…stop laughing…meaning not dry, not moldy, not crumbly. Costco has an excellent fruitcake and there are several fruitcake haters that I know that have turned and joined the fruitcake fan club after eating it.

2. I’ve blown two sets of car speakers.

3. I haven’t had a ticket since I was 17 and was threatened by the government that they could take my license away…even though they didn’t.

4. I have eaten Balut, and while not my favorite, it was not as horrible as I thought it would be. As long as I didn’t think about beaks and feathers, it mostly tasted like a boiled egg.

5. I love chamomile tea, any time of day or night, mostly without any sugar or honey, just by itself.

6. I have a strain of the melancholic that is actually comforting to me.

7. All of the women in my family through at least four generations have loved and had roses in their gardens and on their tables.

8. My favorite art class was Anatomy because we got to use a huge brick of clay to sculpt the human form. I loved getting my hands jammed up in all that clay. Oddly it made me feel vibrant and alive.

9. My siblings think I’m a bossy monster older sister, but they don’t understand that really…I love them like crazy and just want them to be happy and avoid the idiotic mistakes and pits of stupidity that I’ve made and fallen into.

10. I love Project Management and am a total geek about it.

11. Atlas Shrugged is one of my all-time hand’s-down favorite books ever…and extremely applicable to the world today.

12. I’ve had my heart broken…truly…not just sad or really sad gonna-cry-a-little… but fling-yourself-down-on-the-bed-sobbing the-world-has-ended-and-I-will-never-recover…crushed heart…twice.

13. I LOVE Ben & Jerry’s Chunky Monkey…which may be part of the reason I am a Chunky Monkey…LOL

14. My first car was a 1976 VW Bug…Racing Green…which means Dark Green. AND I had to learn to drive a stick to use it and gasoline was $0.82 a gallon…so $3 of change in the ash tray would actually get you somewhere.

15. I’ve been in a mosh pit on several ocassions and liked it…but it always got a little rough so eventually I had to get out…I’m such a girl.

16. I love to canoe.

17. I can play the piano and the harp and would like to learn the guitar.

18. I LOVE to sing, but would like to sing better…Someday I will take singing lessons.

19. In the summer between 6th and 7th grade I bought my first 10-speed bicycle with my own money. It was promptly stolen out from under me 1 week later. I ended up a bruised and sad 12 year-old in the bushes wondering “What the crap just happened???” and “Why would that smiling boy do that?”

20. I met Duff from Guns-n-Roses at the Roxy in Los Angeles with two chicks on his lap, drunk as a skunk and saw Fishbone recite poetry and open up for the Beastie Boys.

21. I really wish that I could have seen The Clash, Oingo Boingo, The Grateful Dead, The Rolling Stones and The Police at the peak of each of their careers. If I could time travel for the sake of music…I would see all of them.

22. I love easily.

23. I wish I could save all the children of the world and somehow find happy homes for all the orphans. I am realistic about people and their habits and passions but I still have genuine hope in human beings and the capacity that they hold within them.

24. I was actively recruited by the Navy to be an Underwater Demolitions Operator.

25. I’ve saved 3 people from drowning and almost died twice, both from drowning, even though I’m an excellent swimmer…5 separate events.

Elizabeth hates the dentist, and doctors. And Clowns.

Ahhhh snow...I love it just before, during and *very* shortly after Christmas...other than that I would rather have rain. Leave the snow in the mountains. I like sweater weather, not moon boot weather, but oh well...we're not moving anytime soon so moon boots it is.

Anyway...second day...second post...I'm continuing on with my Facebook exploration on how human beings tick and what their minutiae and day-to-day and sometimes minute-to-minute statements say about them. I have collected a few. Here they are.

Elizabeth hates the dentist, and doctors. And clowns.
Donn is planning a recession-themed dinner for the weekend. Scraps anyone?
Mary is wondering how the Magic 8 Ball always knows.
Kara has an ultrasound today and is a little nervous.
Tonia is not eating again until March…
Elizabeth would like to have a dumpster, $10,000 and a week alone in the house.
Valerie is guiltily happy that the kids are in bed…
Mark is all smiles!
Tiah is freezing…boo this cold weather!!!
Carlyn is doing just fabulous…is there any other way to be?
Heidi Jo is a rock band junkie.
Natalie has HOPE.
Scott is gearing up to play basketball tonight.
Leslie is just getting back from running, its cooold out there!
Melissa needs a nap.
Marsha is tired.
Dan is afraid that he has forgotten how to shave.
Laura is going to brave the snow and what looks like ice to reach her children.
K is so tired of this bs. I’m starting M on her prescription tonight. Nobody will survive til Friday.
Kristin is freezing! It’s a cold, cruel world…..
Jenny now prepares to go have another long day.
Courtney is happy to have a couple hours of quiet.
Lisa is saying goodbye to the sunshine
Katy is being nostalgic and appreciating the many blessings in her life right now!
Renee is tackling tasks one by one.
Kathryn is not feeling so well. Going to the doctor tomorrow. Again.
David thinks Tess of the d’Urbervilles is a fabulous book!!!!
Chantyl is anxious…
Tiffany is thinking about thinking about working out….

And last but not least...

Elizabeth is wondering why the dog thought I was special enough to come and throw up at my feet.

People...just living life and trying to make it through the day...hopefully without clowns or dog puke on their shoes.

Cheers to the New Year and another chance for us to get it right.~Oprah Winfrey

So, pretty much like most people I have a variety of feelings regarding the New Year...what do I want to do, what do I want to change, what do I want to try...not to mention all the thoughts of "shoulda, coulda, woulda"...but I figure habits are not so easy to change...but it's worth the trying...and new things help to give you additional depth...so it's always good to try something new...so like most people I resolve to change, to try, to do, to be etc. etc. etc. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't...but it's in the trying that I have found change, in the change that I have found hope.

At the least, I find the New Year a great time for introspection and reflection. More than anything I try to remember the things that I've done well and the things that I have learned, things that have helped me to be a better human as I spin through the universe on this planet, not just the things that I've failed at or the things that I've disappointed myself with.

Some things I'd like to see in 2009 for myself, and not necessarily all new things, but some a continuation of where I am already:

1. reading with as much vigor and diversity as I have in the past few years...
2. stretch out artistically, I've stimied a bit here...
3. plant a full vegetable garden and do home canning...
4. volunteer more in my community...
5. exercise 6 days a week, instead of just 2...
6. be on time to church, regularly, because I want to be on time, not because I "should"...
7. find a new job that I love...
8. be loving and kind and patient with my friends and family--which I already try to do, so no sense in not just continuing that into the new year...
9. become proficient on the harp...
10. brush up on my piano playing skills...
11. sing in the church choir...
12. bake bread regularly for my family...

I'm sure there are others...and now that my brain is strolling down this lane, I'm getting pretty excited for the New Year and all the potential that it holds.

More Posts...New Year...Try Harder...Must...Try...Harder!

So, with the new year fully underway I decided I need to be more diligent with the whole blogging thing. I mean, I like it, but I just haven't made it a habit. I guess I'll just have to displace an old bad habit, with a more interesting, new habit...like...blogging.

That said, I have been trying to figure it out in my brain, what do I want to blog about? So many blogs have these specific purposes...and they are delightful...and organized...and full of interesting information. Maybe someday that will be me...but for now...my blog is just going to be "Just Tracy" and I'm going to put all the things I think are interesting for whatever reason into my blog. We'll see how this turns out.

Today's interesting tidbit...I love Facebook and I have had a ton of fun reconnecting with old friends and newer friends and getting all that insider information that everyone puts on their pages...that is probably TMI but is one of the things I love to read about the most. What's your favorite TV show...who cares...does it matter? Probably not...but I'm fascinated by the minutiae of my friends...and in the end, it does tell me a little bit more about what makes them tick. I've also found via live chat all kinds of interesting things. So...that said...without naming names to protect the guilty...and the innocent...here are some of the most interesting things I've found out, seen, typed or heard on Facebook...

A friend who smashes chromosomes
Friends who run the political gamut...Independent, Liberal, Conservative, Libertarian, Democrat, Republican, Progressive, Nothing, Anarchist, I hate politics, Unimpressed
Friends who cover the religious spectrum…Catholic, Jewish, Baptist, Protestant, LDS, Ambivalent, Lutheran, Peace, Love and Understanding and several other similar statements.
Most people who acknowledge the Magic 8-Ball believe in its intrinsic powers to predict accurately.
No one likes to shovel snow or walk on ice.
Most everyone experiences some form of "brain-deadness" during the course of their work day.
Everyone loves their children, and often those same beloved children make their parents ab-so-lute-ly insane.
A traveling parent was willing to pay $8 an hour for a babysitter...when I was babysitting 1000 years ago...I considered $2 an hour a super sweet deal.
A lot of people like Coldplay
A lot of people like The Family Guy...even though several of them feel guilty for laughing.

Most people have read at least one of the Harry Potter books and everyone knows who Harry Potter is without any additional references.

These are just a few Facebook learnings...tune in again for additional details.

In Review Getting Ready to Move Forward

"Here we are in a month named after the Roman god Janus, an appropriate personification of the start of the new year. This particular Roman god had two faces so that he could look ahead toward the future and back at the past at the same time. As we get rid of an old year and look forward to a new one, we all try to be a little like Janus. We know through experience what we did wrong and what we did right, and hope to do better this year. Some people make ambitious new year’s resolutions; others just take a deep breath and hope for the best.…"

******************************************************
What a fantastic holiday season...peace, love and tranquility were present with plenty of laughter, joy and smiles. I love my family and friends and we make such a happy group no matter what the combination or the numbers are...oh yeah...and plenty of good food wherever a gathering was found.

Here are the things I'm thankful for in 2008:

My husband and his love for me, the hard work he does for our family, the friendship he provides and for his amazing sense of humor and wonderful, pragmatic way with words. He is my delight. He tells great stories and doesn't botch the jokes. He is interesting and sees the world through his own eyes...not borrowing anyone else's along the way. I like that he has his own thoughts on how things should be done and follows his own counsel.

My family in all their wonderful diversity. There are six kids and their families...minus the youngest who isn't married yet...he's his own one man family...but he lives with us so I lay claim to him as part of my family until someone lays claim on him in a more permanent fashion. I love my brothers and sister and their families. I like the example that they set in how to be a good human being, good friends, good parents and good siblings. I like that they love our mom and spend time with her, particularly since she is on her own since our dad died a few years back. Each of them have their own way of living life. When I was younger, I don't think I necessarily appreciated this as much as I do now. You know it...but sometimes you don't really **know** it. I have decided through the years, and come to learn, that obviously there is not just one way to live, one way to do things, one way to be, one way to find joy and happiness. There are many ways. To each their own...more happiness to them for taking their own path.

I'm happy that we have a happy home and that we have good wah (harmony: Japanese). It's a peaceful place and it's always where I want to be most...even though I love being other places too. But home is home...and it's a good place that we've created through these years of living life together...working, loving, living, suffering, healing, laughing...and always sticking it out together through to the end...never wanting anybody else more than each other...never wishing that we weren't together. This marriage thing is hard work...harder work than I would have ever imagined when I jumped aboard this train...LOL...but it has been worth it and I'm happy...happier than I think I am sometimes and that is truly a blessed thing.

Looking at the old...and looking towards the new...

"Here we are in a month named after the Roman god Janus, an appropriate personification of the start of the new year. This particular Roman god had two faces so that he could look ahead toward the future and back at the past at the same time. As we get rid of an old year and look forward to a new one, we all try to be a little like Janus. We know through experience what we did wrong and what we did right, and hope to do better this year. Some people make ambitious new year’s resolutions; others just take a deep breath and hope for the best.…"

******************************************************

What a fantastic holiday season...peace, love and tranquility were present with plenty of laughter, joy and smiles. I love my family and friends and we make such a happy group no matter what the combination or the numbers are...oh yeah...and plenty of good food wherever a gathering was found.

Here are the things I'm thankful for in 2008:

My husband and his love for me, the hard work he does for our family, the friendship he provides and for his amazing sense of humor and wonderful, pragmatic way with words. He is my delight. He tells great stories and doesn't botch the jokes. He is interesting and sees the world through his own eyes...not borrowing anyone else's along the way. I like that he has his own thoughts on how things should be done and follows his own counsel.

My family in all their wonderful diversity. There are six kids and their families...minus the youngest who isn't married yet...he's his own one man family...but he lives with us so I lay claim to him as part of my family until someone lays claim on him in a more permanent fashion. I love my brothers and sister and their families. I like the example that they set in how to be a good human being, good friends, good parents and good siblings. I like that they love our mom and spend time with her, particularly since she is on her own since our dad died a few years back. Each of them have their own way of living life. When I was younger, I don't think I necessarily appreciated this as much as I do now. You know it...but sometimes you don't really **know** it. I have decided through the years, and come to learn, that obviously there is not just one way to live, one way to do things, one way to be, one way to find joy and happiness. There are many ways. To each their own...more happiness to them for taking their own path.

I'm happy that we have a happy home and that we have good wah (harmony: Japanese). It's a peaceful place and it's always where I want to be most...even though I love being other places too. But home is home...and it's a good place that we've created through these years of living life together...working, loving, living, suffering, healing, laughing...and always sticking it out together through to the end...never wanting anybody else more than each other...never wishing that we weren't together. This marriage thing is hard work...harder work than I would have ever imagined when I jumped aboard this train...LOL...but it has been worth it and I'm happy...happier than I think I am sometimes and that is truly a blessed thing.