Baudelaire, Cheesecake and Plus Sized Delight

Baudelaire said it best, and for non-Francophiles I've included the translation:

La', tout n'est qu'ordre et beaute. Luxe, calme et volupte.
There where all is order and beauty. Lush, calm and voluptuous.
-Baudelaire, Charles
Les Fleurs du mal,'L'Invitation au Voyage'.

I was talking to a friend of mine today, and she was looking up beads and baubles online. As we went back to the main page, we noticed "Plus Sized Clothing" and she said "Oh I should take a look at that."

As I looked at the words, I thought "Wow...not attractive. That doesn't sound like so many of the winsomely delightful and beautiful women that I know who are round around the edges."

And so I made an executive decision on behalf of my comfortably cushioned cohorts...

It shouldn't be "Plus Sized Women"...how boring and completely unimaginative.

Instead it should be "Deliciously Sized Women that Men in the 1500's Wanted to Paint and Snuggle."

Lush, Calm & Voluptuous...

Am I wrong?

Thanks--I'll go ahead and answer that...No, I'm not.

Nobody wants to snuggle a pokey, bony stick. No offense to the pokey, bony, beautiful sticks that I know...but seriously. What's wrong with a woman with some cushion? You know what they say... "More cushion for the pushin'..." Oh quit being offended. I already posted on Naked Time, don't make me post on the ridiculously comedic human aspects of sex.

ANYWAY--

You look at old paint...you'll see women you can grab onto.

They've got hips to birth babies and breasts to feed them with.

You've got women that can make it all happen. They are obviously cooking, and they are obviously eating, and working, and laughing and loving. I've heard the saying "You can't trust a skinny cook." In life...I have found that this addage is often right. You don't have to be a chubby-bubby-rollie chef, but it wouldn't hurt to look like you enjoy eating a little.

My point is, women need to embrace who they are. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I get it, you need to be healthy and blah, blah, blah. BUT--you don't need to be a neurotic about it. Enjoy a cookie or a cake, have a piece of steak, have some butter on your potato and maybe, *gasp* God forbid, a dollop of sour cream.

Sculpted bodies are beautiful, but so are people of all shapes and sizes. They aren't as perfect, or sometimes even remotely close to perfect, but they are people too. It's not just about how tan, or how fit, or how blonde, or how beautiful. In fact most of the time most of us got a little bit of beauty here and a little bit of beauty there, and where we really shine, is from the inside, from our souls, up through our throats, and out of our mouths and our eyes.

Open your eyes. Look for what cannot be seen. See more.

Right now there is a seriously discriminatory diatribe going on in the world about what you should look like, and what you should eat. I don't want to get into that whole mess, because...well, really just because it's awfully intrusive. What I want to say is let people be.

If you're trying to be healthy, o.k. AWESOME!
If you're trying to improve your physical appearance--OUTSTANDING!!
If you're trying to diminish fat, rid yourself of bad cholesterol numbers or bring down the pressure--A-MAY-ZING!!!
I will never be one to discourage you--in fact--it brings me joy to see your success.

CONGRATULATIONS to all of your efforts and hard work. For myself, I know it's not easy and I applaud your efforts...and my own...to try to lead a healthier lifestyle. I encourage it, and I also want it. BUT--I also want to be happy and live and enjoy life, because it's definitely worth living. Just like I want you to be happy and live and enjoy life...but whether you're pokey and bony, muscle-ey and fit, or on the rounder side, you delight me because you are my friends and family and I love you.

A few years back I was getting ready to go on a trip with two girlfriends. We were co-workers and had known each other for quite sometime, and had gone from being co-workers first, friends second, to friends above all that just happened to work together. Anyway, I was getting ready to go on this trip and I knew the hotel we were staying in had a pool and a hot tub.

Now, if you know me, or even if you've read about my trip to California this summer, you will know that when it comes to pools and hot tubs...I AM THERE. I didn't know what to do. My body is not runway ready, **laughter**, it's not even remotely so and I was worried about what my friends would think, and what would I do?

My beloved, who is always the voice of reason, said to me "Tracy, you need to live your life as though you already are exactly who you want to be. If you don't, you will miss out on opportunities and you will never do the things you really want to do. Besides," he added "these are two of your best friends, they like you for who you are. It won't matter--you'll see. And if it does matter, well do you really want them as your friends if it does?"

So I packed my swimming suit (which my mom always says to never travel anywhere without your bathing suit, because "You never know!") and I went. I had an incredible time. I was a little nervous at first, but I replayed his words in my mind and said "Forget it! Put on the suit and your flip flops and go!" And so I did.

Oh we had a glorious time! In fact, I told them my worry, you know how you do--in that joking kind of way to test the waters for what someone will say--and we all talked and laughed and knew that, gratefully, it didn't matter to any of us.

Here we were--friends--truly women in the Tree of Trust with bathing suits, thighs and hips, bums and breasts--how we wanted them and how we didn't want them--in all their imperfect human glory and we were just who we were. Women. We truly bonded and solidified our friendship on that trip, sharing thoughts and dreams, fears, secrets, most embarassing moments and laughing until we cried.

The imperfections don't matter.

Be who you are--relish in it--find joy in yourself and in others. Life is all the richer for it. If people don't love you for who you are or who you are trying to become, o.k., find new friends. There are plenty of lovies in the world who aren't afraid of finding a new friend. I'm one of them.

Now---Anybody want some Black Tie Mousse Cake from the Olive Garden? ;)